As I sit in my living room on this November evening, I am listening to the sounds of laughter and cooing. My husband and my son. The big James laughing at the little James, who is cooing and "talking" in response to Daddy's voice. It has - again - been too long since I wrote here. As you can see, life has changed dramatically in our household since July.
I could write about the day he was born, on a Monday morning, early - and fast. So fast in fact that Jamie never had a chance to call anyone to tell them we were headed to the hospital, until after our little miracle arrived. My mom thought he was kidding when he said, "She had the baby!"
I could tell you about the first few weeks at home - the laughter we shared at 2 a.m. as we navigated the challenges of nursing a newborn, the sleepless nights, the paranoia that something would happen to James - or I could tell you that over time that paranoia has subsided and we have embraced the pure joy that has come with his arrival.
I will tell you about the amazing journey it is to bring a rainbow into the world. A rainbow baby is one that comes after the loss of a baby...because a rainbow is beauty after a storm; not to negate the ravages of the storm, but to show something of beauty and hope. James is our rainbow baby.
He was born at 8 lbs. 11 oz. and 21 inches long with a full head of dark, beautiful hair. It is amazing to me how quickly you learn about your child. He is, after all, not yet 12 weeks old, but I know him. He has dimples and a charming smile, loves to nurse, and is a happy, content little guy. He has found his hands and started to "talk" to us regularly. James is the baby that makes you want ten more babies.
By far the most amazing thing about this journey is seeing our family transform from a twosome to a threesome. Even after such a short time, I simply can't imagine our life without him. It is hard to remember a life without him in it...we have been so blessed. Watching my husband become a father has to be the single greatest series of moments I have ever experienced. Jamie is as enchanted with James as I am...we sit together and laugh at his smiles and coos. Sometimes I just sit back and watch them together - and just listen to the sounds that have changed my house. A squeak, a squawk, a cry...a coo, a giggle, a sing-song voice that belongs to me or Jamie. We do more laundry than ever before, and there is so much "stuff" sitting around our house. But I don't care - because he is amazing. And totally worth it.